In the middle of all this, Claire must learn to embrace her own maternal side, while flirting with the raptor trainer Owen Grady (Chris Pratt), who unlike her, bonds with the animals and respects them while strutting around in his leather vest and shotgun, ready to protect the female and kids at all costs. Actually Chris Pratt is great in this movie, playing a straight action lead with gravitas and a dose of humor, carrying the screen in an effortlessly charismatic, everyguy turn reminiscent of the kinds of roles Harrison Ford embodied at the peak of his career. I think he proves himself a star capable of a lot more than Star Lord in this big dumb romp, and he may well be the best thing about it. The commentary on what people want from action and action movies nowadays is contradicted by the endless reverence toward the original film, the best scenes from which are not measured up to by any shot of this movie. Spielberg knew how to create suspense like few others, and the old style combination of pro-go animation, animatronic robots and CGI still combine to make the '93 dinosaurs look better than anything on the screen in this film, which are your typical, computer generated monsters (not even Indominus Rex is all that visually impressive- if they're constructing a brand new dinosaur, why would they make her look just like all the others?)
But if anything left me in awe (and not in a good way), it was the climactic battle scene of the movie, where the T-Rex (summoned by flare of course, because that was a famous scene from the first film) teams up with the raptors to take down the villainous hybrid, and not only does this defy logic on principle, but the two then share a "meaningful moment" as they walk away from each other having consciously decided not to fight. They've now evidently become blood brothers, an idea I'm positive a fan fiction writer on the Internet came up with ten years ago, as he replayed the climax of Jurassic Park over and over, pumping his fist in the air in childlike jubilation. At this point, the dinos may as well start talking to each other and nodding, Mr. Ed-style, because that's the cheese level to which we've ascended. Still, despite the ridiculousness of most of the movie, I didn't hate watching it. It moved at a good pace, it was entertaining for the most part, and despite an unnecessary and preposterous military scheme concocted by the hammy Vincent D'Onofrio to weaponize the dinosaurs for foreign invasion purposes (um, seriously?), the charisma and efforts of Chris Pratt and Bryce Dallas Howard (who does her best even as she runs through the entire island in heels that never once come off) keep you with it, even as your brain resists. Is this the definition of dumb fun, a competent but slavish devotion to something we all liked as kids? Yeah, probably. But I'll tell you one thing- ask anyone who liked this movie whether it compares to the first by any measure. The answer will be a resounding no- and that should tell you something else important. Maybe it's time to come up with some new stuff for this generation to call its own, instead of clinging to the relics of the past, wanting them to live forever, so that we ourselves never have to feel any older.
* * 1/2