New Musical 'Yesterday' Asks What if the Beatles Never Existed?

Danny Boyle’s new movie is a fantasy musical romance where the lead gets hit by a car and wakes up to a world where the Beatles never existed, but he still knows all their songs. So of course, in very short order he becomes the world’s greatest songwriter. Could be fun, but it doesn’t look like a comedy, more like a romantic drama with all that Beatles music (the rights for this must have cost a fortune). A tribute movie to the Beatles kind of reminds of that trippy musical Across the Universe- remember that one?

'Aladdin' Trailer Drops During the Grammys

Oh god. Is anyone else going to have nightmares about Will Smith’s Genie tonight? Ugh. This whole thing looks garish and ugly and horrifying, but I’m guessing it’s blue Will Smith that will generate the most chatter. I really wish they would…not make these movies.

'Roma' Wins Best Film at the BAFTA Awards

Well, there you have it. The British Academy has spoken and Roma has taken its first Best Picture prize from an industry group. Of course, BAFTA does not use the preferential ballot that the Academy does for its top award, which means there’s still a race at the Oscars. In fact, BAFTA hasn’t matched Oscar Best Picture for the last five years, because of that. But BAFTA can provide a lot of clues in other areas and often portends the winners in many technical categories. For example, I would now predict Vice for editing, Bohemian Rhapsody for sound, and watch out for this Best Supporting Actress race, because Rachel Weisz could now sneak in and pull off her second Oscar. The Favourite was well loved by the Brits, walking away with seven trophies including Best British Film- they will vote for that movie somewhere at the Oscars too, and Weisz could be its big award (plus she really is the lead of that movie). It also looks like Rami Malek is indeed locked for Best Actor now, and same with Cuaron for Director. And Spike Lee wins for Screenplay, which looks set to repeat at the Oscars too. I’ll be using this winners list as well as the guild ones to make my final predictions, which will be coming in about a week.

2019 BAFTA WINNERS

• Best British Film: The Favourite

• Best Production Design: The Favourite

• Rising Star: Letitia Wright

• Best Hair & Makeup: The Favourite

• Best Editing: Vice

• Best Animated Feature: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

• Best Sound: Bohemian Rhapsody

• Best Documentary: Free Solo

• Best Supporting Actress: Rachel Weisz, The Favourite

• Best Adapted Screenplay: BlacKkKlansman

• Best Original Music: A Star is Born

• Best Original Screenplay: The Favourite

• Best Supporting Actor: Mahershala Ali, Green Book

• Best Cinematography: Roma

• Best Debut by a British Writer, Director or Producer: Michael Pearce and Lauren Dark, Beast

• Best Special Visual Effects: Black Panther 

• Best Film Not in the English Language: Roma

• Best Costume Design: The Favourite

• Best Director: Alfonso Cuaron, Roma

• Best Actor: Rami Malek, Bohemian Rhapsody

• Best Actress: Olivia Colman, The Favourite

• Best Film: Roma

Olivia Colman wins Best Actress for The Favourite- can she beat Glenn Close at the Oscars?

'Cold War' Wins the ASC Award; 'Leave No Trace' Wins Scripter

Non-Oscar nominee Leave No Trace won the Scripter prize- a rare occurrence

In a bit of a surprise tonight, the American Society of Cinematographers gave their top award to Cold War over Roma, both black and white films with gorgeous photography, but Roma was expected to prevail in this category. I think it still will at the Oscars- the ASC has only a 50% hit rate with the Academy lately. Meanwhile, the USC Scripter dinner was held tonight and the prize for screenplay (along with its source material) went to Leave No Trace, a film not even nominated for screenplay at the Oscars. This almost always goes with the Oscar winner for adapted screenplay, but obviously that won’t be happening this year. Spike Lee is expected to come out on top and finally win his first competitive Oscar for BlacKkKlansman- as long as it wins that WGA award next weekend, things look pretty set for that to happen easily.

Albert Finney 1936-2019

Albert Finney passed away today after a short illness at the age of 82. The five-time Oscar nominated British actor appeared in films and television for over six decades. Some of his most notable films included Saturday Night and Sunday Morning (1960), Tom Jones (1963), Two for the Road (1967), Scrooge (1970), Murder on the Orient Express (1974), Shoot the Moon (1982), The Dresser (1983), Under the Volcano (1984), Miller’s Crossing (1990), Erin Brockovich (2000), Big Fish (2003), Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead (2007) and Skyfall (2012), which was his final film role. He was nominated for the Best Actor Oscar four times (Tom Jones, Murder on the Orient Express, The Dresser and Under the Volcano) and Best Supporting Actor for Erin Brockovich. He won an Emmy for playing Winston Churchill in the 2002 HBO film The Gathering Storm and was nominated for two Tonys for his Broadway work in the 1960’s. Do yourself a favor and check out some of his work this weekend- he was one of the greats.

The trailer for 1963’s Best Picture winner Tom Jones:

!967’s Two for the Road, a romance he co-starred in with Audrey Hepburn:

Lightning Round Reviews 2018: February, Part 2

This week I have four entries I missed last year- two westerns, an Oscar nominee for animated film and a teen drama that makes a play for more serious consideration. If all goes right, there will be just two more entries left fo finish off the films of 2018.

THE SISTERS BROTHERS * * * 1/2 (Dir. Jacques Audiard)

John C. Reilly and Joaquin Phoenix are two deadly assassins on an unusual journey

Writer-director Jacques Audiard (A Prophet, Rust and Bone) chose some rather interesting material for his English-language debut- a darkly comic historical novel by Patrick deWitt, which he co-adapted into an atypical western designed as a showcase for its rich cast of character actors, but also turns out to be an offbeat buddy movie/violent shootout/black comedy. It starts off at a meandering, slow pace but becomes more involving as the story develops, eventually morphing into several things at once, one of them a bleak look at the nature of inherited violence in emotionally damaged men. You wouldn’t expect so many tonal shifts out of a modern western (so few of them get made these days), especially one that stars John C. Reilly and Joaquin Phoenix as Eli and Charlie Sisters, two hitmen brothers out to finish a job during the California Gold Rush of the 1850’s. But the plot’s not that important, as anything you might predict turns out to be something a bit different, even with all the shadings of the old-fashioned western still percolating on the fringes. Audiard isn’t trying to reinvent the genre so much as put his own French spin on it, which he does with a splendidly jovial tone (and score by Alexandre Desplat) with spurts of violence, family melodrama and a genial sense of humor- the movie actually gets more entertaining as it goes on, when you stop trying to figure out where it’s going and let the characters lead you there with blinders on. Once you surrender to the very specific treats this film has to offer, it’s a singular delight.

THE HATE U GIVE * * 1/2 (Dir. George Tillman Jr.)

Amandla Stenberg shines in this YA drama with a purpose

20-year-old Amandla Stenberg is a big talent, an appealing newcomer who carries this heavy-handed drama from George Tillman Jr. (based on the young adult novel by Audrey Wells) through most of its melodramatic handwringing, which is unfortunate, since the subject matter is so important and the movie itself so timely. Stenberg is Starr, a 16-year-old who lives in the rough neighborhood of Garden Heights, plagued by gang violence and drug dealing. Her father is an ex-con himself who has to give his kids the “talk” at 10 years old- the one about how to deal with police as a black citizen when you’re inevitably pulled over. Starr’s mother sends her to Williamsen Prep, a private, mostly white high school in a different neighborhood in order to protect her, forcing Starr to navigate life as two versions of herself- the one at school with her white friends and boyfriend (Riverdale’s KJ Apa) and the one at home with her black friends, family and omnipresent threat from gangs and cops. The first half of the film deals with these issues very succinctly, as the way Starr maneuvers through the two worlds illuminates what passes for normal life if you’re a teenager and person of color just trying to fit in. Then a tragedy occurs as Starr becomes the witness when her childhood friend Khalil is killed by a police officer when the two are pulled over, causing her worlds to collide. The movie presses hard on the issue of unarmed black men being gunned down by law enforcement, who often face no justice when a grand jury chooses not to indict, or even when cops are found not guilty in the face of blatant evidence to the contrary. Tillman Jr. deserves credit for not stepping away from the inflammatory topic and confronting the issues it brings up directly (especially in a film aimed at a teen audience), but the movie becomes bogged down with too many contrived incidents, as Starr’s family is pursued by the King Lords, a gang with ties to her father, leading to several clumsily directed scenes that tip from earnest to overwrought. Authentic emotion and outrage mix with histrionics that are the trappings of nearly all material wrung from young adult novels, overshadowing and weighing down the film’s social relevance. 

THE BALLAD OF BUSTER SCRUGGS * * * (Dir. Joel and Ethan Coen)

Tom Waits is a prospector digging for gold in the old west

Anthology films are inevitably, hit and miss. They’re almost designed that way, as a movie comprised of six shorts aren’t usually all of a director’s best work (especially if they’re all from the same writer-director, as this one is). As such, the Coen Brothers’ Ballad of Buster Scruggs is a mostly charming entertainment, a play on classic western tropes in the same way much of their past work can be defined as a play on other genres, like the screwball comedy, film noir, gangster movie, etc. But with their own, unmistakable Coen flavor of course. In this film, many Coen collaborators, along with some new faces, show up to play a part in a western short story- from Tim Blake Nelson as a singing gunslinger, to James Franco as an unlucky bankrobber, to Tom Waits as a crazed prospector. My favorite is the longest, the fourth in a series of six vignettes set in the Old West, starring Zoe Kazan as a naive Oregon Trail traveler who navigates an unbearably polite and practical courtship of a cowboy guide (Bill Heck). Each short offers its own amusements, whether it’s in the reliably quirky and darkly comic Coen dialogue, the gorgeous cinematography shot by Bruno Delbonnel (Inside Llewyn Davis, Darkest Hour) all over the American southwest, to the original music and authentic costumes. You can see nods to every myth of the American Wild West, from what we’ve read in stories to what we’ve seen in classic westerns like Stagecoach and Treasure of the Sierra Madre. Not everything is gold however (the Franco short in particular is rather pointless, and Liam Neeson’s huckster taking advantage of a handicapped man as a sideshow attraction takes too long to get to its payoff), but what is here is done with such artistry and affection for its source inspiration that it makes for a fond, enjoyable diversion.

MIRAI * * * (Dir. Mamoru Hosoda)

Flights of fancy make Mirai something to remember

Mirai, or Mirai of the Future, is a loving, magical realist look at the impact a newborn baby has on a family’s life. Toddler Kun is profoundly affected by the birth of his sister Mirai, and the changes it wreaks on the household, as he loses the constant attention of his parents. As a result he fashions a fantasy world in the courtyard of the family home, where he meets the grown version of his sister, the human version of his dog Yukko, and other relatives at different stages of their lives, both living and dead. Each of them has a lesson to teach him about growing up and learning to accept the changes life brings, and though nothing about the message of this film is particularly new or enlightening, the beautiful images of the handrawn animation still enchant, since this is a style most U.S. studios have completely given up on and that Japan still does so well. Especially memorable is the extended climactic sequence that sees Kun lost in his own mind and trapped in the word of runaway children, an expansive and intimidating Tokyo that would scare the pants off any kid who contemplates running away from home. The scene extends to the exploration of a literal family tree that Kun falls into, given a chance to see the past, present and future of his family all at once. The imagination displayed in these scenes are the unforgettable parts of the movie, the parts that make it stand alone among the great scenes in animation this year.

'Avengers: Infinity War' Tops the VES Society Awards

So, this is the guild award for visual effects, but this guild hasn’t been very predictive of the Oscar in this category lately, for whatever reason. Even so, I think Avengers might win anyway, because the other nominees aren’t particular standouts this year (maybe Ready Player One, but that doesn’t seem to have much heat in the category). We’ll have to see what wins the BAFTA to make the best guess here.

• Outstanding Visual Effects in a Photoreal Feature: Avengers: Infinity War

• Outstanding Visual Effects in an Animated Feature: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

• Outstanding Effects Simulations in a Photoreal Feature: Avengers: Infinity War; Titan

• Outstanding Effects Simulations in an Animated Feature: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

• Outstanding Animated Character in an Animated Feature: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse; Miles Morales

• Outstanding Animated Character in a Photoreal Feature: Avengers: Infinity War; Thanos

• Outstanding Created Environment in a Photoreal Feature: Ready Player One; The Shining, Overlook Hotel

• Outstanding Created Environment in an Animated Feature: Spider-Man; Into the Spider-Verse; Graphic New York City

• Outstanding Supporting Visual Effects in a Photoreal Feature: First Man

• Outstanding Compositing in a Photoreal Feature: Avengers: Infinity War; Titan

Alfonso Cuaron Wins the DGA For 'Roma'

Yay, Alfonso! As expected, Alfonso Cuaron won his second DGA tonight for Roma, becoming only the second person to win the Directors Guild Award for a foreign-language film (the first was Ang Lee for 2000’s Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon). With that he becomes the heavy favorite to win Best Director for the second time at the Oscars, and Roma is a also a favorite for Best Picture, but not a sure thing, with the top three guilds (SAG, PGA and DGA) going to three different films this year (Black Panther, Green Book and Roma). That makes the Best Picture race still a close call, but probably between Green Book and Roma. It all depends on what can win on that ranked preferential ballot for Best Picture, and with the new Academy membership that doesn’t match any of the guilds, the truth is no one really knows. Last time it split was 2015, with the SAG winner Spotlight coming out ahead of PGA winner The Big Short and DGA winner The Revenant. But unlike Spotlight, this year’s SAG winner Black Panther does not have nominations in the major categories besides Picture, like writing, directing or acting. And there’s still a slight possibility something else entirely could come through in the end. Best Picture is still a wild card this year.

2019 DGA WINNERS

• Feature Film: Alfonso Cuaron, Roma

• First-Time Feature: Bo Burnham, Eighth Grade

• Documentary: Tim Wardle, Three Identical Strangers

'Spider-Man' Dominates the Annie Awards

Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse won all 7 Annies it was up for tonight, making it the solid favorite to win the Oscar, but I won’t believe it ‘til I see it. This is the Academy, and they have a really hard time not going with Disney/Pixar here, no matter what else is nominated. Hopefully they take the hint from every single precursor award.

2019 ANNIE AWARD WINNERS

• Best Animated Feature: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

• Best Animated Feature-Independent: Mirai

• Best Animated Special Production: Mary Poppins Returns

• Best Animated Short Subject: Weekends

• Best Virtual Reality Production: Crow: The Legend

• Animated Effects in an Animated Feature Production: Ralph Breaks The Internet

• Character Animation In An Animated Feature Production: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

• Character Animation in a Live Action Production: Mary Poppins Returns

• Character Design In An Animated Feature Production: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

• Directing In An Animated Feature Production: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

• Music in an Animated Feature Production: Incredibles 2

• Production Design In An Animated Feature Production: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

• Storyboarding in an Animated Feature Production: Incredibles 2

• Voice Acting in an Animated Feature Production: Bryan Cranston (as Chief), Isle of Dogs

• Writing In An Animated Feature Production: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

ADG WINNERS

Production design seems set for Favourite or Black Panther

Meanwhile, the Art Directors Guild spoke tonight and awarded The Favourite, Black Panther and Crazy Rich Asians. The Oscar for production design is between The Favourite and Black Panther, and I’m not sure which one to go with. Gonna have to guess on this one.

• Period Film: The Favourite

• Contemporary Film: Crazy Rich Asians

• Fantasy Film: Black Panther

• Animated Film: Isle of Dogs

'Bohemian Rhapsody' and 'The Favourite' Win ACE Eddie Awards

Ugh. The Ace Eddies are the Editors Guild awards, and usually a pretty important Oscar precursor. The fact that The Favourite beat Green Book in comedy is significant, but so’s the fact that Bohemian Rhapsody beat BlacKkKlansman- those two were the only ACE drama nominees to get a Best Picture nomination. It shows once again just how loved Bohemian Rhapsody is, despite the fact that it is objectively NOT a good movie. Seriously, people? You think its editing was better than First Man, Roma and BlacKkKlansman? That kinda makes it the frontrunner to win the Oscar in the category, so the movie will likely go home with two Oscars. Amazing.

EDITING AWARDS

• Feature, Drama: Bohemian Rhapsody

• Feature, Comedy: The Favourite

• Feature, Animated: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

• Feature, Documentary: Free Solo

Pedro Almodovar is Back With 'Pain & Glory'

I’m always here for a new Almodovar film! This one is coming out in Spain next month and might be playing in Cannes this year. Called Dolor y Gloria, or Pain & Glory, it reunites him with Antonio Banderas and Penelope Cruz. His last two films got mixed reception (although I really liked Julieta), so it’s time for a comeback.

Lightning Round Reviews 2018: February, Part 1

This month I’ll be posting weekly in the effort to get all these reviews up- my self-imposed Oscar deadline for my top ten is fast approaching and I still have a handful of films left from last year to catch up with. This latest group is a mix of mostly good, a couple really good, and one dud. Enjoy!

THE WIFE * * * (Dir. Bjorn Runge)

Glenn Close is formidable in The Wife

Glenn Close stars in this minimal drama that almost plays out like a chamber piece. As Joan Castleman, she’s been the long suffering, supportive wife of an acclaimed author, Joseph Castleman, whose books have been bestsellers for the last 35 years, and who just won the Nobel Prize for literature. But there’s a big secret lurking underneath their so-called perfect marriage- it turns out Joan was the one who wrote all his novels. As the Castlemans fly to Stockholm for the Nobel Prize ceremony in 1992, Close takes us through all of Joan’s hidden emotions, as closeups reveal her to be the world’s most talented liar, a woman who can be believable as the supportive wife of an egotistical, self-indulgent man, taking care of him and cleaning up all his messes while standing by smiling as he belittles her own writing ability while giving her credit for being his “inspiration” and “muse.” But under the surface she’s fuming and furious. The move belongs to Close, who inhabits this woman on the edge of boiling over, and also to Jonathan Pryce, who’s wonderful as the arrogant, failed writer who has no problem taking credit for his wife’s words and basking in it, while stewing in his own resentment of her talent and taking it out in continual affairs. The movie itself is small and contained, taking place mostly in one hotel suite over the long weekend, with some flashbacks to the Castlemans meeting in the late 1950’s and seeing how they began to perpetuate this fraud (Joan not only wrote his books but was responsible for getting him published in the first place). It’s a tour de force of acting, a two-hander that makes the most of both actors’ longtime professionalism. Glenn Close makes it look easy- so natural as the meek and quiet housewife who protects her husband’s reputation, yet so commanding as she bursts through the screen with her righteous and earned indignation and searing takedown of the man she secretly detests and outwardly adores. It’s a powerhouse performance, perhaps one of her best. 

PRIVATE LIFE * * * 1/2 (Dir. Tamara Jenkins)

Will a baby make everything better or worse?

It’s really a shame Tamara Jenkins has only made three films in the last twenty years. Her debut film, 1998’s Slums of Beverly Hills was an acutely observed comedic gem, 2007’s The Savages another seriocomic dramedy filled with authentic observations of real life, and now, Private Life fits neatly in her oeuvre of real people dealing with life size problems that befall average families and couples. Even if your life is not that of middle-class New Yorkers Richard and Rachel Grimes, you recognize their pain, their feelings, their comforts. As a career driven couple in their forties they are now desperate to have a baby and have spent the last few years in fertility treatments of all kinds, as well as on the endless waiting list for adoption agencies. The angst-ridden trials and various failures have wreaked havoc on their marriage, but their genuine desire to figure out some way to make this happen now has them taking the risk of asking their niece, 25-year-old college student Sadie (Kayli Carter) to be an egg donor to increase their chances of successful IVF. As Sadie is drawn into their obsession and becomes desperate to please them, the strain of infertility pressures the lives of Richard and Rachel’s family members as well as themselves. As realistic as this film is regarding the struggles of childless middle-aged couples, it’s never a downer, as Jenkins’s knack for sharply realized human behavior plays itself out in the reality of everyday emotions, moving naturally from humor to sadness to angst and back again to warmth amidst familial rapport. As hard as it’s been on their marriage, this is a couple that fits together like a glove, and Paul Giamatti and Kathryn Hahn are so perfectly matched it’s as if their relationship and dialogue fell out of the sky. We feel we know them, as well as Sadie and her parents (her mother played by Molly Shannon in pitch perfect concern/hysterical mode). The movie may be a little long and meandering, but that only helps it to feel ever more realistic and unformulaic, like stepping into someone else’s shoes. As far as I’m concerned, Tamara Jenkins hasn’t missed once, and I only want her to get more tries at bat.

A PRIVATE WAR * * * 1/2 (Dir. Mathew Heinemann)

An unimaginable job requires unique characters to do it

A Private War is a biographical film about a reporter that feels much more authentic than most journalism movies. This could be because of director Mathew Heinemann’s background in documentary filmmaking with a journalistic bent- he’s made films about the American healthcare system, Mexican drug cartels and the Syrian uprising- he understands the seriousness of purpose and the mission of truly dedicated journalists to uncover and relay the truth. Marie Colvin was one of those journalists- an American reporter who worked for the Sunday Times in London as a war correspondent and spent twenty-five years traveling to active war zones all over the globe, risking her life and putting herself in as much grave danger as any citizen or soldier embedded in the areas she visited. Rosamund Pike plays Colvin in a career-best performance- practically unrecognizable as she physically transforms herself every bit as much as Christian Bale does in Vice, but without the aid of makeup or prosthetics. Changing her walk, her voice, and way of carrying herself, she inhabits this woman so completely you forget who you’re looking at half the time. As the hard-drinking, hard-living Colvin, who’s addicted to the chase and riddled with post-traumatic stress from her time in war zones (she even lost an eye from a 2001 explosion in Sri Lanka), you respect her dedication to the job even if you can’t manage to understand how anyone could want to do it. The film follows her as she teams with a loyal photographer (Jamie Dornan) to cover the Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya and Syrian conflicts from 2001-2012, on the frontlines of every major international conflict until finally, tragically prevented from doing so. Taking us inside the world of the fearless and dedicated war correspondents who risk everything to cover the stories the rest of us don’t see, this film gives you a new appreciation for the those who give their lives to bring us the truth, and a sense of hopelessness when you contemplate what kind of a difference these fiercely courageous citizens are making in the world, if any.

WIDOWS * * * (Dir. Steve McQueen)

Steve McQueen’s first film since 12 Years a Slave is a far more intelligent thriller than usual

Widows is not what you’d expect. A supposed heist film based on Lynda La Plante’s 1980’s BBC miniseries is not really a heist film at all (the heist only takes place in the last 15 minutes and until it happens we don’t even know what they’re planning to do). Instead, it’s an unconventional thriller starring a large ensemble cast that has a lot more on its mind than any one heist. Viola Davis stars as Veronica Rawlins, a woman whose criminal husband (Liam Neeson) dies in a job gone wrong. She is then threatened by the man whom Harry Rawlins stole from and ordered to pay back the debt herself, so she gathers the other widows from Harry’s gang to help her plan what would have been his next job. It sounds simple enough, but the film is nowhere near that concise. There are issues raised in this screenplay involving racism, politics, class conflict, inner city poverty, prostitution, corruption and greed. There is no scene where at least one of those underlying themes isn’t hinted at or explored with one of the many characters, from the other widows (Michelle Rodriguez and Elizabeth Debicki) to the corrupt candidate running for city council and his father (Colin Firth and Robert Duvall) to the rival gangsters after the money and trying to move up from the criminal underworld to the criminal political world (Brian Tyree Henry and Daniel Kaluuya). All of these conflicting issues and conversations make for an intelligent and far more interesting thriller than anyone would anticipate, even if the movie bites off more than it can chew, by bringing up so many issues with so many characters, that it effectively shortchanges many of them. Still, Steve McQueen’s surprisingly straightforward direction makes this a not inaccessible or dull film, and the level of ambition and strong performances (especially from Davis and Debicki) in a genre movie of this kind are so unique that it makes the experience worthwhile.

AQUAMAN * * (Dir. James Wan)

You just can’t take fish people seriously

Is it possible to make a lighthearted action movie about underwater fishpeople warriors, and yet also make it a two-and-a-half hour epic? Well, you can certainly try, but sitting through this thing will guarantee you come out of it at least a 50% dumber. James Wan gives it his all (he really throws everything at the screen), but this extra long, extra dumb origin story of Aquaman, King of Atlantis is one of the silliest, most ridiculous superhero movies you’ll ever see. But at least it knows it, right? Well, sort of. The movie plays up a tongue-in-cheek tone, letting us know that we’re all in on the joke together, as the half human, half Atlantean Arthur Curry (Jason Momoa) is very much a dudebro who spends his time half on the surface, half underwater rescuing submarines from pirate attacks. Then we get a little Thor drama, as his evil half-brother Orm (Patrick Wilson) wants to take over Atlantis and launch a war on the surface people, so Arthur is summoned to the sea to rescue the kingdom, take his rightful place on the throne, and save the world. He gets a love interest in Amber Heard, who plays Princess Mera, and a loyal godfather type in Willem Dafoe, who teaches him how to use his seapowers, but the biggest problem with the movie is that it goes on and on and on. It gives you your money’s worth if what you want is sheer spectacle, as Wan zips through locations for every action scene, from a submarine to the neon-colored glowing lights of Atlantis to the Sahara desert to an Italian seaside village, to the apparent forest in the center of the Earth’s core (really), back to the sea again. And he throws in crab people and water monsters on top of Atlanteans and Power Rangers looking assassins in armored robot suits. But my god is it relentless. I think I was overpowered and done with it by the 90 minute mark, only to have it throw another hour’s worth of action scenes at me. The one thing I’ll say is that Jason Momoa is fairly likable and has a goofy, charismatic screen presence- we always know he’s laughing with the audience, which is necessary to carry all this nonsense off, especially through the endless running time. A 90 minute, nutty cartoon might have been bearable, but this epic treatment for what amounts to a live action, but mostly animated, underwater war movie is mindnumbing. Although, who knows, if you’ve always wanted to see Oscar-nominated Willem Dafoe mount a seahorse and shout “Surface dwellers! To arms!” this may be the movie for you.

BUMBLEBEE * * * (Dir. Travis Knight)

The goofy Bumblebee is kinda cute

So, full disclosure here. I have never seen a single Transformers movie. Not one. So why did I decide to give this one a shot? Well, for one thing, I knew it wasn’t directed by Michael Bay. And second, I knew that it was a prequel, so there was no worry that I’d be lost. So having said that, how was the experience of sitting through my first Transformers film? Well, it was surprisingly sweet, actually. Director Travis Knight comes from animation, having directed Kubo and the Two Strings, and you can sense the touch of an experienced animation director all over this movie, which plays out like a cheery live action cartoon, more of a “girl and her pet” coming of age story than a wall to wall action movie. In fact, the action in this is not wall to wall at all, there are only two extended action scenes that I can think of, both relatively brief and efficient (but well animated with CGI of course). After a prologue that recaps the Autobots vs. Decepticon battle in space, Bumblebee is sent to Earth and winds up in 1980’s San Francisco, having lost his memory and vocal chords, hiding out in a junkyard as a beat up yellow Beetle. Enter 18-year-old Charlie (Hailee Steinfeld). Still grieving the death of her father and wanting to fix an old car to relive their father-daughter bonding moments, she winds up with a brand new robot friend. Yes, this is the classic E.T./How to Train Your Dragon/Iron Giant formula at work and it follows just about every step in that predictable blueprint, but thanks to Knight’s sunnily optimistic touch, it has such a doggedly cheery, earnest, heart-on-your-sleeve attitude about it that I found it winning me over practically through sheer force of will. Steinfeld is an immensely appealing screen presence and hey, Bumblebee is a pretty cool friend to have on your side. There’s not one note in this movie that isn’t telegraphed, and it is in fact so openly cheesy that it boggles the mind, but it embraces its cheesiness wholeheartedly, with every goofy cartoon character in on the fun and enjoying themselves along with Bumblebee, who’s just as lovable as all those previous movie alien friends. The kinds of pleasures it delivers are familiar and of the guilty kind, but in the end, pleasures are pleasures and I have to admit I fell for it.